This morning I fed my soul while I fed my stomach. (oatmeal with honey, strawberries, and banana or blueberries has been my breakfast of choice lately) I’m reading Mark. My enjoyment of the gospels right now focuses around my desire to constantly know Jesus better. I figure that studying His time on the earth will help fulfill that desire and open my heart and mind to Him in new ways. I’ve read Mark many times before, but God always shows me knew things as I enter scripture and seek His heart.
Today I read Mark 6 and 7. I was struck the most by the first part of Mark 6 where Jesus returns to his hometown and isn’t received well. God impressed on my heart how the people in Jesus’ hometown thought they knew Him the best and therefore totally missed out on a lot of who Jesus really was. It was a really big encouragement to me because, as you might imagine, being gay and being a follower of Christ invites a lot of doubt, questions, and judgement over my life and my relationship with God. Sometimes I wish I was impervious to the doubt and fear because it’s very discouraging. But, I was reminded by this passage that Jesus shook up people’s firmly held beliefs about God and that reminds me that we can never know for sure all that God is doing in the world or in the church or in any one person’s life. Keeping my eyes on Him gives me strength to remain in His love despite the opinions (and all the other things going on) around me.
Don’t get me wrong. If you don’t understand me or agree with me, that’s ok. But I think it’s always good to focus on the unconditional love of God before we approach any issue! This has brought immense encouragement to me today.
Now, I know there are many questions that people have for me (and for Lindsey) about how we arrived at the conclusion that being gay is ok. Don’t worry, we were both raised in church and we know how most Christians feel about “the gay lifestyle”. (whatever that may be in your mind) So I thought I’d post a link to a blogger that has become a friend of mine. She has written some amazing stuff about the verses in the Bible that refer to homosexuality, and she does a much better job of explaining it all in words than I ever could do! (plus, it’s already written down, so that saves me a lot of writing time!! ;)) She is a straight christian with an amazing story of how God changed her thinking and brought more truth into her life. If you have any questions about what Lindsey and I believe (and have spent a lot of time studying ourselves) on what the Bible says about homosexuality then checking out this link will be a great starting point for you!
Kathy is also on facebook (look her up in my friends), and she loves talking about this issue with anyone and everyone. It’s amazing. :)
Know that this is just a summary of some of the things God has been teaching me about His word. I continue to search after Him with all of my heart. I am confident that He will continue to bring me into the light of His truth and surround me with His love. And I am willing to follow Him wherever He leads. Both Lindsey and I have made that commitment to Him, and we don’t believe we have the corner on truth or that anyone but the Holy Spirit does. We are willing to lay down our relationship if we ever feel that is what He desires, but as we continue this journey we discover more and more freedom in Him, and we are both growing in our relationships with Him more and more every day.
I write all of this because it is my hearts desire to share my thoughts, to bring others alongside me in this journey, to give you the opportunity to see life from the perspective of someone who might be very different from you or might not be, but especially to continue to live my life with authenticity and honesty, trusting in the unconditional love of God, and trying my best to live with a fearless love and infect others with a passion for a fearless love.
It is only by God’s grace that I stand.